I used to make bad choices when I liked someone. I thought if a person was really into me, it meant they loved me. I was wrong. I let people treat me badly because I always saw the good in them. If they acted wild, I thought it was just fun. I fell for a big trick called “love bombing” many times.
Because of that trick, I got used to crazy feelings. When a nice person came along and wanted to be calm and sweet, I got bored. Can you believe that? I thought fighting was love. I thought being safe was boring.
If you feel this way, you are not alone. It is easy to fall for this trick.
The Internet Trick
We all look at our phones a lot. We see romantic love memes on our screens. Romantic love memes are funny pictures with love words.
Some romantic love memes are very silly. But some romantic love memes tell us a lie. They show people acting crazy. They show people buying big gifts. They make us think love is supposed to be a wild storm.
It is okay to look at romantic love memes and laugh. But we cannot use romantic love memes to know what real love is. Real life is not a picture on a screen.
What is Love Bombing?
Love bombing is a big trick. It is when someone gives you way too much love, way too fast.
Think of it like eating too much candy. At first, it was so yummy. You feel super happy. But then, your tummy hurts a lot. That is what love bombing does to your heart.
The person is not really in love with you. They want to be the boss. They give you so many happy feelings that you get stuck. Then, one day, they stop. They take all the good feelings away. You feel very sad and try to get the happy feeling back.
Here is how to spot the trick.
Sign 1: Too Fast, Too Big
It feels great when someone likes you. But a love bomber goes too fast.
- They buy you a big toy after knowing you for one day.
- They say they want to marry you after one week.
- They plan a big trip before you even know their last name.
This happened to me. A boy I just met told me what our kids would look like! I felt so special. I thought I was so great that he could not help it.
But that is a lie. They do not know you yet. They do not know your favorite color or what makes you sad. How can they love you? They rush because they do not want you to see that they are bad.
Sign 2: Too Many Messages
A love bomber will text you all day long.
- “Good morning!”
- “Are you awake?”
- “What are you eating?”
- “Why didn’t you text back?”
If you do not answer in five minutes, they get mad. They ask, “Are you mad at me?” or “Do you hate me?”
I used to think this was nice. I thought, “Wow, they must really like me!” But it is not nice. It is like they put a leash on you. They want to know where you are every single second.
Sign 3: The “Only Us” Trick
A safe friend wants you to play with other kids. A love bomber wants you all to themselves.
They might say bad things about your friends. They might say, “We only need each other.” This is a trap. You need your friends and your family. A good person will never make you leave your friends.
The Sad Part
After the love bomber traps you, they change. The sweet texts stop. They get mean.
Your brain gets confused. You remember the fun start, and you want it back. You might even send them romantic love memes to make them smile again. But it does not work. The nice person from the start was wearing a mask.
How to Be Safe
You are very smart. Now you know the trick!
Do not look at romantic love memes and think you need a crazy love story. Real love is a slow walk. It is not a fast run. Real love is calm, safe, and kind.
If someone gives you too much too fast, say “No thank you.” You deserve a love that is good for you, not a love that hurts your tummy.
